Dare to Be YOU!
One of our facilitators, Brooke Moran, prior to our in-person workshop with Red Van (our client spotlight this month and the event we reference in the article below) in Scottsdale, Arizona in December 2023. Brooke stands victorious on a rock during our ‘prep hike’, during which we set our intentions and got into the space for our facilitation.
How Leaning Into Your True Self Fosters Connection & Better Leadership
Last month, my colleague and I began a session with a client by diving deep into one of the most foundational aspects of a rock-solid organization – namely, what it means to be a team.
We started the day by reviewing a team assessment that everyone had completed prior to coming together in person, which allowed them to explore elements of how their team functions and the role each of them play in it. And in the afternoon, we did an exercise that our team likes to call, “More About Me” (think of it as a more heartfelt “Truth or Dare”, but without the “Dare” part and in the context of the workplace). It’s worth noting that this is a team where some of the members have worked together for quite some time, while others were new to the organization, so there was a real mixed bag of people in terms of how familiar they were with one another. Regardless of this, each and every person there dug deep within themselves during this exercise, sharing events in their lives that helped shape who they are today and, consequently, how they now function as team members and leaders.
What we found when they did this was pretty remarkable. Not only did the exercise seem to create a space where people felt more connected to each other, but we saw that people were better able to understand each other after this experience, which in turn made space for deeper collaborations and more supportive approaches to problem-solving later.
You may think to yourself…Really? All of that improvement simply from sharing information about yourself?
Well… Yes.
And no.
It’s not that sharing information about themselves suddenly made this team work together perfectly without a hitch in the fabric; the exercise is not a magic pill, after all. But what it did was pave the way for people to connect with each other as humans and to better understand each others’ ways of being and leading while strengthening their sense of dependability between each other. In other words – it reinforced their collective sense of community.
We’ve known for a long time that having a community, whether it be made up of family, friends, co-workers or other connections, has a huge impact on our physical health. In fact, an article from the University of New Hampshire shares that “the health risks of prolonged isolation are equivalent to smoking 15 cigarettes a day”. With a significant portion of workers in our country spending eight hours a day at work, it stands to reason that people who feel lonely, disconnected, or isolated in the workplace might suffer there as well.
An article from TIME puts it this way: “Having friends in the workplace can not only boost job satisfaction and performance, but also improve wellness. It’s linked to a lower risk of burnout, better mental health, fewer traumatic experiences, and maybe even a longer lifespan, according to studies conducted by researchers in Spain, Japan, Germany, Iceland, and Israel, among others.”
Though our goal with the “More About Me” exercise may not have necessarily been for people to become friends in the traditional sense of the word, it was for people to create connections that allowed them to feel seen and understood, and that gave them a sense that they had colleagues who would support them in being the best employees and leaders they could be. As the same TIME article points out: “The goal isn’t necessarily to make life-long friends – although it’s great if you do – but rather to foster “a sense of being in the right place” by becoming part of a community with a larger purpose.”
Leading by Example Through Being Yourself
From a leadership perspective, fostering these kinds of communities built on creating space for who people truly are and where they shine as leaders can also be seen as smart business. Because when people have the support they need to let their strengths shine, they will, and your organizations (I’m talking team culture, operational efficiency, and the bottom line) will only be better for it.
The same is true for leaders themselves.
Because when leaders better understand themselves, and can identify and lean into their own core values, the courage and trust necessary to speak your truth and take action emerges. I have seen this to be the case not only in my own life, but in the life and careers of my clients. This type of solid connection to one’s leadership point of view helps leaders find their voice and stand up for what they believe in in a way that often supports the ultimate mission of the organization and can help teams unlock their greatest potential.
When a whole team is able to do this, it creates nothing short of magic. But it all starts with having a leader who’s able to be an example and set that precedent.
I’ll leave you with a quote from Harvey Bierman, CEO of Red Van, one of our most recent clients. I think it summarizes the importance of creating spaces where teams can connect to themselves and each other in order to reach for their potential. He says: “I’m grateful — for the experiences that have gotten me to this point which allow me to be mindful enough to want to be the best version of myself, but ok knowing I’ll never be that. And recognizing that being a leader isn’t about being the best version of yourself, but the work it takes to try.”
In order to be the best leaders we can be, we have to get back to our true selves, to what makes us human, to what has shaped us and what we value – and to steadfastly allow that to guide us. One’s voice and action, after all, is only as powerful as one's alignment to their own purpose and authentic self.
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AUTHOR – Gretchen Reid is the Founder and Chief Change and Leadership Architect for Integrated Growth. She has spent over 25 years coaching leaders and creating award-winning Leadership and Talent Development Programs, directly contributing to multiple awards for her clients, including Fast Company’s 50 Most Innovative Companies, Forbes America’s Best Employers List, Forbes Best Employer for Diversity, and ASTD BEST. She is an Adjunct Professor of Change Management in the Strategic HR Masters Program, Denver University, University College. (MS, Career and Human Resource Development, Rochester Institute of Technology, BA, Psychology & Business Management, University of Rochester)